Author’s Note: Any title of any work I cite will have a hyperlink attached and a footnote so you can find their books/work.

I said I was back last year…and here I am again, hat in hand. Now that I am leading a group at church based upon Brant Hansen’s Blessed are the Misfits¹, and in my second year of my Master’s of Divinity (I’ll bore you on the details of that later), I have a little more theological context. I’ve even read through a bit of my old posts, and while I won’t take them down, the quality of my understanding of the Bible has risen, and I think my blogs should reflect that. Since I am no expert, it can only improve (hopefully, through Christ).

Back to Hansen’s book, in Chapter 10: Blessed are the Wounded, he talks about being, well, wounded. It is in the name, after all.

In John 5:6, Jesus asks a man, “Do you want to be healed?” I had never really considered this verse until it was brought up in the book. Hansen also quotes Henri Nouwen (also author of “In the Name of Jesus,”² which I highly recommend):

“Nobody escapes being wounded. We are all wounded people, whether physically, emotionally, mentally, or spiritually. The main question is not, ‘How can we hide our wounds?’ so we don’t have to be embarrassed, but “How can we put our woundedness in the service of others?” When our wounds cease to be a source of shame, and become a source of healing, we have become wounded healers.”

I use a lot of my “hurts” to help Abigail. I was a teenager once (as much as that shocks her), and whenever I get frustrated with her lack of doing chores or being a bit of a sarcastic butthead to get a laugh, I realize she is lightyears ahead of where I was at that age: depressed, anxious, withdrawn, and ANGRY. I thank God for that…for the hurts I felt at that age because it helps me guide her (and thank Christ she’s already naturally mature and poised). These hurts also help me avoid repeating mistakes in my own life, thereby being a bad example to her.

Her own hurts, seeing her mother near death more times than any of us can count, have absolutely helped her guide others, particularly her brother, who, at 5 years old, doesn’t understand when Momma goes to the “hossabull”. While I would rather her not experience these things and I’ve carried a lot of guilt for years over situations well outside my control, I have seen this pain turn her into the caring, responsible, emotionally intelligent young woman she is today. I thank God for that and I know she does, too.

There is blessing in pain and while I’m not a huge fan of being in pain, I welcome it as a way to one day help others when I’ve been healed of it through Christ.

Hansen closes out the chapter thusly: “But if we want to experience God in a different way, start something new, and be a blessing to people, we have to want to be healed. Yes, the wounds are real, but you know what? Healing is real, too.”

To echo Hansen here, you need to heal before you can become the “wounded healer” Nouwen describes. Period. Full stop. Like an airplane, put the mask on yourself before assisting others. It is not selfish – it is necessary.

1. https://www.amazon.com/Blessed-Are-Misfits-Introverts-Strugglers/dp/0718096312 ↩︎
2. https://www.christianbook.com/the-name-jesus-reflections-christian-leadership/henri-nouwen/9780824512590/pd/12596?en=bing-pla&event=SHOP&kw=books-0-20%7C12596&p=1179517&utm_campaign_id=376791042&dv=c&cb_src=bing&cb_typ=shopping&cb_cmp=376791042&cb_adg=1229254242063092&cb_kyw=default ↩︎